The Person I Would Like To Be

September 19, 2016



I often see posts with titles like “Ultimate Bucket List” or “25 Things You Should Do Before You’re 25” and so on. It can seem a bit overwhelming if you hold yourself to all those standards set by other people; there’s so much to see and do and so many amazingly productive habits we are supposed to be developing. I often feel frustrated at how long it takes me to get things done,but in reality not many of us can be a super-successful entrepreneur who buys a house and spends 3 years travelling exclusively to 5* hotels. To be honest, I don’t really want to be that person either – if that’s your aspiration then cool, but I’m happy with a lot less. I wrote a list for myself of things I’d like to do or see or achieve in my quest to become the person I’d like to be. Here it is.

Spend a lot more time in New York – I’ve given up my dream of moving here altogether because HOW DO YOU GET A VISA but I can certainly keep visiting roughly every 2 years as I do currently.

Live abroad, and then finally come back to London armed with home furnishings from Parisian flea markets and Finnish design shops.

Buy new sheets and a mattress protector and throw out my current set. It’s kind of horrifying to be sleeping on sheets that have had a cigarette burn/whisky stain on since the 2008/2009 era and have since seen me all the way through university.

Either get better at replying to messages, or, (and this is more likely) live in hope that people will stop messaging me via facebook messenger/twitter DM/e-mail/whatsapp so I don’t have to constantly feel guilty about failing to reply. If it’s not a message to a page or a twitter notification then I’m not going to reply.

Spend more weekends outside.

Take advantage of travel deals. You know those people who are signed up to every discount newsletter going and constantly whizz off on “city breaks”? I want to be that person.

Read all of the books on my shelf. How I own books I’ve never read is beyond me, but it’s a pretty horrible trait. See also: owning clothes I’ve never worn (luckily no longer the case).

Mend all the clothes in my “mend” pile and fix all the clothes in my “fix” pile.

Perfect the art of making a Missionary’s Downfall (I’ve already got my first favourite cocktail, Bloody Mary, down to a T).

Learn how to make vegan caesar salad dressing from scratch.

Write articles for other publications besides my own personal blog.

Write every night in my diary.

Share my comics and drawings with people. It’s not like I’d start an etsy shop but I could show my friends, you know?

Go to the cinema more. I LOVE going to the cinema and yet when it’s suggested it always seems easier and cheaper to stay in and watch something on Netflix in my pyjamas. But when you actually go it’s such a thrilling experience.

Regularly have people round for dinner instead of once in a blue moon.

Continue to purge my belongings. I’ve gotten quite good at throwing stuff out, but you can always have less!

Go “out out” at least once every couple of months. That seems like it would be hard to avoid, but these days months pass without ever being properly hungover.

Be less patient with people and be more selfish with my time. You can’t spend your life waiting around.

Stop reading articles about saving money, when I’m already great at it and have nothing to save for, anyway.

Record and share more of my songs. They’re what I love most of all.

Hold my tongue every once in a while and just stay away; the new awful girlfriend of a favourite mate, the ignorance of the Leave voter in a close friend’s family, the idiot friend from out of town. I could meet with these people and bristle with annoyance and contrary opinions, or I could just stay away.

Stay curious, and unapologetic, and sceptical.

Eat more ice cream cones.

There you go. What kind of person would you like to be?

9 comments so far.

9 responses to “The Person I Would Like To Be”

  1. I loved your list and I don’t know where to start, but let’s see 🙂 I normally don’t share many personal things, but I have already bought some places, thankfully mortgage free, and travelled for many years, lived abroad as well, BUT I am not a snob booking 5 stars hotels – I won’t say it didn’t happen sometimes, but I am very fine with sofas at friends’ houses or 2 star hotels. I had some adventures with half star hotels 🙂 and they were OK. We all survive, right? A night with some cockroaches won’t kill 🙂 I am exaggerating, but I swear the places could well have them 🙂 I loved your plan about NYC. And to live abroad. I agree with you in so many points – replying messages, mend clothes, sharing drawings, and hold my peace in front of an idiot friend – I normally think everybody is important in life, but I used to have a friend that everything I did was wrong and she was the best, oh yes. After years of patience reading and hearing her bullying, I finally managed to get rid of her. She hacked my blog a month ago, then. What for a lovely person, hahaha! I learned maybe not who I want to be, but when she was a friend, I learned something even better – the way I didn’t want to be 🙂 You are so right in everything you said! But don’t push yourself, please – who am I to give advice, but if you don’t accomplish all, it’s also fine. I hope you have a great week!

  2. The person who has enough balls to pack her things up and move to a city she feels she belongs to – London.

    Slightly more self confident, ready to say everything to everyone.

    Person that travels more and lives everywhere for some time.

    Person who is ready to do something more meaningful with her blog.

    Person who is not clinging to everyone who shows any kind of interest in being friends with her.

    10 pounds lighter person and 50% more cheerful person.

    A woman who can put on anything and look drop dead gorgeous.

    A person who moved out from her parent’s place.

    A person that’s not putting herself down.

    A person that survived this mid 20s crisis.

    Most definitely NOT the person who due to low self esteem won’t do any of the above.

  3. Caitlin says:

    LOVE THIS!! I especially love your framing of it:)

  4. I bought new sheets thinking i needed some because mine didn’t fit, but i was wrong. I also bought a new mattress protector too. What I need now is a new comforter.

  5. reshma says:

    Stay curious, and unapologetic, and sceptical…. I like that! Great post!

  6. kikyohatake says:

    Those articles that tell you what you should be doing before the age of 25 stress me out! Haha! On the New York Visa thing. I have a friend from South Korea who’s dream is to live in New York. The only way to get a visa to live here is to find a job. Whether it’s an internship or whatever you need a job and get a work visa. I think depending on your country of origin the work visa can last for 2 plus years but you have to keep renewing it on time and showing proof of your job or you will kicked out fast. I think there is a certain amount of time you need to be here before you can apply for citizenship but honestly that’s the most difficult thing in the world. Besides, living here is expensive like jeez.

    • Laila says:

      Aw thanks for the info! I think my problem is I work freelance so it’s difficult for me to prove certain work requirements as the work varies all the time. I might need to look into changing career in order to live in NY I guess! x

  7. Spokhette says:

    You draw comics?! I would love to read them, I am actually looking for an artist for a small weekly comic I am wanting to start. Perhaps you could help me with that. I also wish I could write in my diary more, by the end of October, you will have fulfilled writing for other publications. I’d say you are on your way!

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