Well, I think it’s time for a reintroduction. Welcome back to Tape Parade!
The loyal, bored, and curious amongst you may have noticed my blog has been down for several weeks. This year has prompted me to deeply reflect on how I present myself and communicate my ideas; who am I, now that I am older? When I sat down and took stock of all these things. I realised I was all the things I had always been: confident, self-assured, thoughtful, creative. I was the same anime-loving and fortune-telling girl I had been since girlhood. The same introspective analyst who’d rather stay in writing songs than go to parties that I had been since my early teens. But something had slightly changed.
I don’t really go in for big reinvention. Since my earliest memories I’ve had the same primary interests and motives, the same ethical code. These things have grown and expanded rather than ever being replaced and I think a large part of my assurance comes in this very clear identity. I don’t think I’ve ever been good at conveying that. In person, yes, not a problem. But online, where I have had to manufacture these odd facsimiles of myself? No. My professional website has always been slightly too serious, my YouTube too varied and irregular, and whilst my blog has gone through phases of feeling “me-like” it also has taken a few hits. I think there’s been too much fitting of a mound and not enough “this is who I am”. And so it lacks the potency; becomes distilled somehow.
There’s also been the absolute glaring omission of some key parts of my life. Where is the section on religion and spirituality, being a Muslim and/or Christian? Is race no longer an issue? What about the magic I practise every day, my cards, my animals? My investigations into my family? People search Mental Health all the time for a smooth zero results and it makes me feel false.
-Two new websites: this one, and my professional website, which I’m extremely proud of.
-Six new blog posts, covering empowerment, well-being, witchcraft, allyship and more.
-The debut of a new post style: this post which is practically a short story memoir piece about love, loss, growing up, Sally, and the Brazilian football team. This one felt different to write. I’m proud of it.
-A new monthly newsletter. This will replace the four (!) I was haphazardly running before and unites everything – work, blogs, events/gigs, life musings, favourite articles – in one place. Sign up here!
-Two new categories on this blog: well-being (comprising of mental health, physical health, some lifestyle, empowerment, self-care and life advice) and magic (comprising of witchcraft, crystals, cartomancy, spirituality, astrology, religion). These categories will get more fleshed out going forwards.
–Five new songs (mostly from my Edinburgh show).
This is far more than a new blog theme and few extra tags. This is a change in perception. This year has been a monumental one for me so far, after previous years were filled with frustration and statis, this year has propelled me forwards. I am the same person, but galvanised, stronger and more alert. I have always felt fuller and more present in real life than I have been online, and the incarnations of me that exist online have always felt a poor example of the true me. But now I feel clearer on what I’m doing and what I want to say and how to express that online. Thank you for being here and seeing what that looks like.